Reflections on 2008

January 1, 2009 at 1:30 am (Gemma Wiseman's pics, Gemma Wiseman's poetry, haiku) (reflections 2008)

Pic by Gemma Wiseman ~ My treasured fairy now hangs from the back verandah railing of my new home in the Dromana Hills, Mornington Peninsula
~

STRANGE, MAYBE SYMBOLIC CIRCUMSTANCES

* 2008 began with the death of my mother at the end of January. I felt not sadness, but a sense of relief, a kind of release. For too many years I agonised over pleasing her but always failed. She forgot about me for some years and just lived in her own world with my brother who had some mental problems. He finally left her in a nursing home and simply disappeared. I do not know his whereabouts to this day. (That’s a very short version. I won’t dredge up more painful details!)

* 2008 ended with the death of my ex husband, the father of my children. His cancer was only discovered earlier this year. His 4th wife wanted to go to Indonesia to see her family for Christmas. They left Australia on 15th December. Oddly, that was the day I moved with my beloved partner to our new home. And my ex died on 30th December in Indonesia. (Another strange circumstance ~ My daughter and son needed to organise funeral arrangements and the only office open on 31st December was in Camden, where we all used to live as a family until my ex took flight with his next new love.) Once again, I felt no seering sadness. Just a sense of more relief, as if finally I really do have a new, promising world ahead.

* My partner has cancer and cannot work. Yet he lives on. He was very stressed and often flared with anger during the house move. I was so worried. And now, he seems content, relaxed, happy.

* The new home seems to have a special magic. I believe in angels is a sign on the lounge room window. The house seems deliberately designed closely following feng shui principles. There are old prayer flags strung beneath the back verandah. The garden is wild and overgrown, but, with a little trimming here and there, we have discovered plants long hidden ~ like a beautiful lavendar bush. The skies are big and high and always mystically changing round this mountain retreat. The waters of Port Phillip Bay are great for dreaming.

Already, I long to own this home. It feels so right.

Where a fairy swings
Delighting in new vistas
Magic harmonies
~